Sometimes a combination of my spelling and typing does me in.
meYo bitch!
rogeh?
meI'm a bad boy wrapper
meI mean rapper. Blast!
rog[laughs]
Although one might say this is a Freudian slip (slide?). You know what a Freudian slip is? It's when you say one thing and mean your mother. I made one this morning at breakfast, I meant to say "Pass the sugar dear" and ended up saying "You ruined my life bitch!". Aah I crack myself up. It ain't for no reason they call me THE (T)WIT.
Anyway I am hosting Uborka's cocktails this afternoon. In spirit with my commenting, it's a sleazy theme. So tell me what sleazy cocktails you want, and sometime between after lunch and when I leave Liverpool to head south, I'll serve up the cocktail sleazfest you all would expect of me.
1. steve
I want a Pork sausage slammer with a black pudding twist.
Ooops I forgot the Kosher Card.
In that case I will have a Moist Manhatten Mound and KY spritzer.
2. Graybo
Is this one of those seedy bars that my mother told me never to go to? Either way, I’ll have a vodka and tonic. I don’t want to order a namby-pamby drink and look like a nonce, as I might then get beaten up by the surly bloke sat in the corner.
3. Green Fairy
I’ll have a Cocksucking Cowboy please, just to prove to myself that I did indeed once see it on the menu of the Purple Turtle in Camden and it wasn’t just the product of my feverish imagination.
And a rub down with a dirty flannel. Ta.
4. Stuart
I’ll have a Victorious Blogging Prostitute please.
That’s;
Bell(e)’s, 3 parts, fruity juice, 8 parts, some woman’s parts, and liberal dashings of Angostura Bitters.
5. Mark
A Harvey Wallbanger, please. But in a really sleazy way.
Green Fairy, what did you expect of the Purple Turtle? Tsk.
6. Adrian
Mark, their will be no knocking of the Purple Turtle. An excellent spot indeed with fit bartendresses and slutty drinks. Don’t make me spike your drink. ….
7. Lyle
Adrian, you’re doing a lot of drink-spiking today. I’m not sure we should trust you next Thursday. Grin
I’ll be fairly unsleazy, and just have a Long Comfortable Sloe Screw against the Wall, followed by Sex on the Beach.
Thanks.
8. pix
I’ll have a quickie, closely followed by a screaming orgasm.
… and make it snappy taps foot impatiently
9. Mr.D.
I’ll take a Vodka Strangler, please.
That’s “Nice and sleazy” c. 1975.
Much obliged
10. Mark
That entirely depends on what you spike the drink with, Adrian.
May I suggest extra vodka.
Mmmm … extra vodka. Vodkalicious.
11. Daisy
Boring old fart here: could I just have a nice cup of tea please?
12. Gordon
If I ask for a Blowjob* can you get one of the bartendresses from the Purple Turtle to give me it?
And as for a cocktail…
Ohh and feel free to spike my drink
13. krissa
i’m feeling lazy. i’ll have a Comfortable Screw Against the Wall, please.
Three, actually.
14. Beth
I’ll have a Sexy Bartender, please.
15. Sara
I want a Bloody Brain Shooter, and a Sex in a Volkswagon.